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My cupcakes..pic

Chubbs, you are beautiful. You have so much going for you

please do not let anyone make you feel bad about heaviness. No, you did not blame anyone, but it could be a gene. My youngest daughter has been through so much misery because she is very heavy. A beautiful girl, so talented, yet she has allowed these "SKINNIES" to make her feel less of a person, and still does. She has more going for her than they ever will. And I am sure you do also. You are a dear, and don't you ever forget it, my friend.
 
Thanks, Ms Mai. How sweet.

Being fat is a whacko, complex thing. And it's different for everybody. I was born lite- about 6 lbs... and since about age 4 I've been overweight.

But to simplify it (or else I could go on and one forever...)- for me, I just figure, everyone has SOME issue. Be it addiction to coffee, smokes, drugs, sex, etc. I guess all in all, at least most fat folks can still hold jobs and function socially! Not trying to reduce it to something completely benign & innocent, 'cause we all know it has a serious side, but really, I just decided long ago that it's not something I wish to cry about any longer.

At least I'm not alone in the dilemma... some mighty fine folks are super-sized!

And in the meantime, I take it day-by-day... some days I'm good- some days I'm not so good...
 
I fully understand being a "full-size" meself! I have gained

a lot of weight since by-pass heart surgery and should have been going the other way in pounds. I am a foodie, love to cook and love to eat. I do my best but sometimes that just isn't enough. I lose and gain, then lose and gain. But, ya' know what, I am a good person, try to serve the Lord, have a lovier face and hair than most and under this heaviness I have a shape that would knock their eyes out. I was born under 2# and almost didn't make it. I was always encouraged to eat. ALWAYS!

Was doing good until my late 30's, stayed around a size 10, then started gaining so spent a lot of time dieting. I watch the intake of sat fat because of my heart condition and have the South Beach Diet Book right here beside me. I do well some days other times I just lose it and start to eat the good stuff. I am happy and I know that you are too. Do your best and don't worry about the rest, Chubbs. You are precious just the way your are.
 
Heck, I probably weigh more than both of you. Started for me when I passed 40 and quit smoking (5 pack+/day) that I had started while in Vietnam. I was qualified then to be a Seal in the Navy, but today I would qualify for The Biggest Loser upcoming show if I had a partner. That's the way life is. I don't sweat the bullets and I'm comfortable with the person I am and my friends are comfortable with me. I ignore the ignorant people.

I love "canning" because I can play with food and not eat it. I just finished doing a whole bunch of Beets I got from the Farmers Market last week. Roasted them in the oven, sliced them for the jars and canned them with some nice pickling brine. I did sneak and eat one extra beet but I've learned to limit eating them or I scare myself the next day when I go to the bathroom. When I do get around to eating the products of my labor, they have less salt and sugar than the commercial stuff and taste soooo much better.

Stay happy. We have our feet solidly on the ground.
 
Thanks again, Ms Mai!

Great post, CanMan!

I could go on and on... I'm fat and wish I weren't. I know I have the power change those circumstances somewhere deep inside- and sometimes I have made temporary changes- but I just can't make it "stick"... so far, anyway.

Hell, according to her latest TV commercials, even Oprah and all her $$$ and resources still suffers and is still plagued by the demons that make her heavy, and prevent her from making lifelong healthy adaptations...

I guess my thing is- I still try and still make the effort... but I'll be damned if I'll ever let myself be shamed into making changes anymore. I realize my value isn't weight-related at all. Self-love, and realizing others still love us is SO important.

Anyway- thanks to all for the kind, generous support.
 
We went to my MIL's a few days ago. I had made chicken soup and brioche for a woman she goes to church with who just started chemo. I sent her the food and a couple of jars of the jam. Soo I mentioned to her that while at my FIL's for Christmas I noticed the oldest grand daughter was much skinnier. She said oh I know! I have been telling her to eat more. She said I think it is just where she has gotten taller. I said well um..I wonder if someone..maybe at school has said something to her about her weight and she has started dieting. MIL..oh no I think she is just taller. SOoo..then I go into talking about Jons friend who is always telling his stepdaughter she is fat and exactly what I think of him and his comments. She was all I couldnt agree more. You know I honestly dont think she even remembers doing it. That is how little attention she pays and how scattered she is.
 
wow, janie!

Possibly too, she's just playing along to divert blame from herself for the counter-productive, potentially-dangerous techniques she's opted to take on and use. Sad...

There can sometimes be a fine line between doing the right thing- and doing harm. One definitely needs to pick and choose the tools they use carefully, 'cause it's a serious, serious thing.

One could definitely side with her in her concern and hope to steer a child towards more healthy options- no harm in that, if done properly. But forcing, or handling it in ways that harm or could possibly have unintended, dreadful outcome is the norm with many of these "good intentions". Eek!

Kudos to YOU in your continued efforts!
 
I feel so sorry for the two kids. They are at that age where they notice boys and hope boys notice them in a positive light and here she is throwing in her two cents worth.
Sometimes I can over do it though. My sis took her 5 year old somewhere once and someone remarked on how pretty she was and my niece goes..my Naney says Im beautiful lol. I just always want them to know especially while they are to young to get into trouble that I think they are wonderful beautiful little people and I couldnt be more proud of all of them.
 
I keep reminding my daughter that she has to either

dodge them or be sympathetic to the shortcomings of 'shallow' people who judge heavy people by their weight, instead of the productive people that they are.

Here is a pic of the two of us.
SendPix
 
RE: "Here is a pic of the two of us. "

Awww... great pic, MsMai! You're quite a lovely-looking pair! smiles- k.

(And you and Eddie too, Cath!)
 
Thank you for the kind words, Cathy. We are not Hollywood

material but, dang, we look better than the people that make her feel like crap. It really doesn't bother me alot when people comment on my gaining weight, but she is young and it ruins her day. She is only 5' tall and cannot carry the weight well.

I quit smoking also when I had heart surgery, 2.5 packs a day, and my new addiction has become food and I admit it. I am addicted to it but I try real hard. I have just lost some weight (yeah, again) but I am geared to losing it because of my health, not what folks say or think.

We can all work together for our health purposes! Right now I am doing 75% South Beach (unable to stick to it otherwise) but have to alter it to low-fat ingredients to suit my need :) A least, my NY resolution is to try harder.
 
CanMan, speaking of Biggest Loser, which is one of my favorite shows, two fellas from my home town was on there. They lost the weight they wanted to lose although not the Biggest Loser for that series. That is some hard work!
 
Msmai,

I'm not completely familiar w/ South Beach but Atkins-type eating has worked well for me for losing, too.

My only beef with it (pardon the pun!) is I often crave fruits and juices. I found that eating mainly protein for several days- then allowing myself a full day of fresh fruit maybe once every 10 days or 2 weeks still worked well.

Plus that occcasional fruit day became part of my motivation- something to really work hard to earn.

Also- and I consider this a benefit, though some would not... I haven't eaten Atkins-style for nearly a year and I STILL don't crave breads, potatoes, pasta, rice or any of those types of carbs (though I have gradually gotten back to craving SWEETS). Life for me prior to Atkins, I NEEDED those starch carbs DAILY!
 
Thanks for the tips, Chubbs. Perhaps we could all try together, those interested

in losing a few pounds, and sort of check in with each other. No bad mouthing when we slip and fall, 'cause I know I am going to, but pick each other up during those times an just be good support for each other. What ya' say, folks?

P.S. When it comes to carbs, Chubbs, I could drink a cup of gravy. :D
 
If that cup of gravy is not slurped up directly, it definitely is soaked up with some good freshly made bread.
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Carbs are good for us, right??!!
 
Jon's buddy who is always telling his girlfriend's young daughter she is fat came by last night. He is always scowling at his girlfriend if she takes anything I give her to eat sooo last night I gave her a bowl of ice cream and offered him a bowl of wood chips that I use in my smoker. Everyone else thought it was funny except him. I told him they would not be without flavor..they were hickory.

He made the dumbest comment. Said it was my fault Jon has a belly and that I should stock the cabinets with only healthy food and Jon would have to eat it or starve. I said you dont know Jon as well as you think then. He wouldnt eat it he would just have someone else take him to the store. Then I asked him what would he do if his girlfriend only stocked his fridge with junkfood. He got this look on his face like he was bewildered I had even had the thought. His girlfriend was raised in a very religious family and she was taught to believe you do as the man says without question. WELL I let and like for Jon to take the lead in almost everything but nothing like those two are. You can see his girlfriend has a great sense of humor and I think with some tutoring I can make her as evil as me. ;) When I would get a good one off of him she would laugh and if he heard her he would turn and give her this disapproving scowl til she quit. All that did was fuel the fire and I let him have it even more.

He said he didnt want me to spend time with her :rolleyes: This is his second relationship. He and his first wife are divorced. His first wife was a real witch and she took advantage of him. He is over compensating for that with the woman he is with now and it is so not fair to make her pay for the first wife's behavior. They have been together a couple of years and Im hoping he will relize what he is doing and knock it off. I could see last night that she was biting her tongue alot about what he said. When she has had her fill and the lid blows its gonna be ugly. I would hate to see him blow such a good thing.
 
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