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Thought For the Day...

As you slide down the banister of life, may the splinters never point the wrong way.

Definition of a teenager? God's punishment...for enjoying sex.

The only time the world beats a path to your door is if you're in the bathroom.
 
You guys are really bad:D
KYH, today I felt like both the bug & the windshield:D

I also have a good one for goodness sake "Treat others the way you would like to be treated".
 
Never appeal to another persons better nature, he may not have one. Appeal to his self interest instead. That way you can reach a mutually acceptable accomodation.
 
Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt"

- Abraham Lincoln
 
I make these primative hand-made stitchings on tea-stained linen of quotes, that I then frame in distressed folk-art frames made of re-cycled barn-wood to give as gifts to loved ones at holiday time. I made one for my sister a few years back that more than a few of her friends have commissioned me to make for them, too. The quote is:

"Before you were born I wanted you. Before you were conceived I longed for you. Before I held you I would die for you. This is the Miracle of Love."
 
from a customer at The Wilkes House, a country-style restaurant in Savannah:

Surely it would be a terrible thing to die of low cholesterol!
 
The optomist believes we are living in the best of all possible worlds.
The pessimist fears that's true.
 
A Few Thoughts From Comedienne Rita Rudner:

1.) 'Most turkeys taste better the day after, my mother's tasted better the day before'.

2.) 'I was a vegetarian until I started leaning toward the sunlight.'

3.) 'My grandmother was a very tough woman. She buried three husbands and two of them were just napping'.

4.) 'I got kicked out of ballet class because I pulled a groin muscle. It wasn't mine'.

5.) 'A man will go to war, fight and die for his country. But he won't get a bikini wax'.

6.) 'I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life'.

7.) 'I was going to have cosmetic surgery until I noticed that the doctor's office was full of portraits by Picasso.'
 
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